But In Everything, Pt. 3

“Very early in the morning, while it was still dark, 
Jesus got up, left the house and went off to a solitary place, where he prayed.” 

― Mark 1:35 {NIV} 

Last month, I ended Pt. 2 of this post with the question, "Where does that leave those of us who struggle with prayer?" Today, I'm attempting to wrap up some loose ends, and this question is one giant loose end. Over the last year, the Lord has been working in my life, teaching me about trusting Him, listening to His still, small voice, and understanding the importance of spending time in His Word and in His Presence. 

As I shared in Pt. 1, prayer is one area where I struggle. Though it shames me to say it, for the sake of complete transparency, I must now admit that there have been times in the last year when I have gone days without talking to my Father. The days go by, nothing bad happens, no stressful moments or tense work days, nothing that would jar me into conversation with my Creator. In the last few months, as the Holy Spirit has been really bringing about conviction in this area of my life, I have to wonder about myself, at why I would not want to talk to the God who knit me together and gave me life.

“The function of prayer is not to influence God, 

but rather to change the nature of the one who prays.” 

― Søren Kierkegaard

As God has been working on me, molding me, changing me, I have come to realize that it's not about praying because it's something, as a Christian, I'm supposed to do, it's something that, as a daughter of God, I want to do. I desire to communicate my troubles, my gratitude, my hopes, and my petitions to my Heavenly Father.

There have been times over the last few months, when I have literally dropped to my knees in the middle of the kitchen, overcome by friend's need and taking it to the only Source who can help. I spend hours, folding and ironing laundry and talking (out loud) to my Father, sharing the troubles of the day, thanking Him for His many blessings, and seeking His advice and wisdom. In other words, as Lewis and Kierkegaard pointed out - prayer is not changing God, it is changing me.

"In the same way, the Spirit helps us in our weakness. We do not know what we ought to pray for, but the Spirit himself intercedes for us with groans that words cannot express. And He who searches our hearts knows the mind of the Spirit, because the Spirit intercedes for the saints in accordance with God's will." {Rom. 8:26-27}

What has been YOUR experience with prayer? 

Do you struggle to believe in it or is it a normal part of your daily life?